My husband and I have been watching a lot of The Seventies Show lately. One of the characters is named Red and he always calls his son Eric, dumb ass. Dumb ass has now become the new pet name that my hubby and I call each other. Regardless of the topic of conversation, it typically ends with one of us calling the other ‘dumb ass.’ And every time it’s spoken, we crack up laughing. There is just something funny about calling someone dumb ass. Say it out loud. There now, wasn’t that funny?!
Dumb Ass Cups
Today I stopped at Kroger to pick up some groceries. On my list was Red Solo cups. We don’t use them a lot but I like to have them around. And let’s face it, after the Toby Keith song any color other than red just won’t do. So I grabbed a pack and when I got home I noticed this;
Where were these when I was in high school? We REALLY could have used these at keg parties back then. I used black Sharpies to write names on cups. Think of the time and energy I wasted. I was such a dumb
ass, why didn’t I come up with this idea?
But on a different note I did come up with an idea. When I was driving home today, I was shoving a McDonalds’ burger in my mouth. And not a ‘cheap’ burger, one of the burgers off the ‘special’ menu, cause I’m
classy like that.
The burger had a piece of paper wrapped around the bottom so all the shit and sauce and stuff didn’t fall out in my lap. As I was eating the
burger and the paper at the same time, it occurred to me that someone should invent edible paper to wrap the burger with. That way when a dumb ass like me eats it, we won’t die.
A Dumb Ass Note
Will had a note sent home from his teacher last week. It basically stated that he skinned up his knee at recess because he does not know how to swing properly. WTH?! She went on to explain that a swing must
come to a complete stop before a child gets off and that we should have a
discussion with Will so that he can learn how to do it properly.
Give me a fricken break. Next I suppose they’ll have the kids wearing helmets at recess. The kid is seven-years-old and that’s what seven-year-old kids do. But just for fun I sat down with Will this morning
and explained the basic rules for swinging. He looked at me like I was a dumb ass but I was really just trying to be a smart ass.
Another Dumb Ass Idea
While I’m on the topic of school, here is another issue that brings the term ‘dumb ass’ to mind. In order to make up the snow days the kids missed they have extended the school day for the remainder of the year. The kids start nine minutes earlier and leave five minutes later each day. A whooping fourteen minutes is made up each day.
Or is it? My kids ride the bus and the bus schedule hasn’t changed at all. The kids claim when they get to school they sit in the gym until the teachers arrive because the teachers are not required to make up
the time. They just sit in the gym. Doing nothing. I guess were shooting for quantity and not quality?! Regardless, whoever thought up that plan is a total and complete dumb ass.
I could go on and on about dumb ass things or dumb ass people. In fact someday I'll do a Dumb Ass part 2 blog. Let me know of any dumb ass things you come across and I'll be sure to add them.