Rubber Nut Neil
So a guy walks into a bar and……so that’s how most jokes start out but the story I’m going to tell you about really happened. I had the pleasure to share this story with some of my family members at a wedding yesterday.
Friday night was date night for my husband and me. We went out for an amazing supper and then decided to stop at a couple of the bars in town. We have a total of 4 and had never been to 3 of them. The first bar we stopped in was comical, the locals were sitting at the bar drinking beer and watching
Wheel-of-fortune, yelling out answers. Everyone was very friendly. An old man pulled up a chair and sat down at the table with us. He introduced himself as
Rubber Nut Neil.
Neil explained that he was 82 years old and he pointed to his wife of 56 years sitting at the bar. When we asked why he had such a strange name he pulled an acorn out of his pocket and set it on the table. He asked us if we knew what kind of nut it was. We each picked it up and scoped it out; it looked like the typical acorn I would find laying in my backyard. Our answer was that it was an acorn.
Neil looked down and shook his head, not impressed with our answer. He then grabbed my husband’s beer bottle, placed a thumb over the opening and smashed the acorn on the table. As it busted open, a condom came out of the tiny nut. We were amazed.
Neil explained that he has been making these “rubber nuts” since the 70’s. He slices off a small section, hollows them out and then puts the condom inside and then doctors up the top perfectly. He told us about a $3,000 order he had for a bar in Oregon. He sells the nuts for $2 each. I bought 5 to show family and friends.
Neil orders condoms in bulk and claims the UPS man once told him that his order should last him for the rest of his life. Neil explained that the order wouldn’t last him one week! My husband and I had a great time on date night. It’s the sights and sounds and people you meet that make life interesting.
Have a wonderful day passengers, I’m happy to be back!