I heard he was MIA but I wasn’t too concerned, I knew he wouldn’t get far. I found him face down in the mud in the back yard, his parachute cord wrapped around his neck. By the time I got him into the house, I too was covered with mud. His dog tags confirmed his identity. I started with his boots. They were so tight on his feet that I feared I might pull his foot off. Next I removed his clothes and began cleaning the mud out of his ears and off of his face. Soon dark eyes were glaring at me. I spoke softly but he didn’t answer. Very gently I cleaned off his muscular arms and chest; he had a rock solid set of abs. I found no wounds or signs that he had been injured. I breathed a sigh of relief as I laid him down to rest. Next I cleaned his uniform and boots by hand, making sure not to leave behind any signs of the traumatic event that had occurred. Left outside overnight in the frigid temperatures, he had survived. He wasn’t afraid, he was brave and strong. But I was stronger; I had rescued my son’s partner in crime, the plastic hero that he calls GI Joe.
Thin Mints vs. Oreo’s
I just have to get this off my chest. A serving size of Thin Mint Girl Scout cookies is 4 cookies. Don’t you agree that it should be measured in sleeves and not cookies? One sleeve should be a serving and there should be two servings per box, who can eat only four of these cookies and stop? If you know someone that can I would like to shake their hand. If Thin Mint cookies would go head-to-head with Oreo’s it would be a TKO for taste. I love Oreo’s too, especially Mint Oreo’s but Thin Mints have 6 grams of saturated
fat per serving vs. only 2.5 grams in a serving (2 cookies) of Oreo’s. That means Oreo’s are healthier! That’s a good thing because the majority of the year that’s what I eat. Dipped in ice cold, fat-free milk it’s the to-die-for snack that I can’t keep my hands off of.
Thin Mints are really Fat Mints in disguise!
Bad Christmas Gifts
Santa Claus in all his merry wisdom gave my daughter a Monster High Hydration System for Christmas this year. It’s a water chamber a creepy
doll sleeps in. Unbeknownst to me, the Hydration System has been leaking and was half empty by the time my daughter noticed this today. Her dresser is ruined. The water has warped the wood on the top and in a line where it was running down the front. It’s not a total loss, I’ll be able to strip it and sand it
down but still what a pain. I suppose the doll can now sleep in the coffin shaped jewelry box instead of the water chamber.
And while I’m on a roll with toys here I would like to add that I received a set of Pyrex storage containers for Christmas that I wanted very badly and I found the majority of the set in my daughter’s bedroom today filled with colorful Orbeez. If you haven’t experienced the joy of Orbeez you are really missing out. You pour a packet of colorful powder into some water and four hours later you have tiny, colorful, water filled balls that are good for
nothing except sticking your hand in and wasting good Pyrex dishes. They bounce when you drop them and explode like tiny peas when you step on them. Whoever invented this toy needs to be smacked or shrunk down and stuffed into a Monster High Hydration System.
Happy Tuesday passengers!